Waiting on Dreams: Before Your Big Break
Do you ever feel like time is passing and you haven’t achieved much to show for it? Do you wonder how long it will take to get your “big break”? These feelings can be quite overwhelming and if not carefully managed, they can make you begin to question your potential. However, it is also possible for you to go through your waiting period differently. Between when you start to aspire for new heights and dream of new possibilities and when those dreams eventually come true, you can experience a lot of transformational growth.
Time
An inevitable factor in the process of waiting for dreams to come true is time. It’s also probably the most difficult to grapple with. Here’s an example of why: Sometimes, you want to try out for an opportunity, but it would be such a huge sacrifice to make at that point in your life. Your finances, health or family circumstances may not make it easy for you to pile on an additional time and energy demand, even if the opportunity is a great one. Therefore, you may have to pass up that offer. It’s okay. Make peace with it and trust that your right time WILL come.
I liken the “right timing” concept to a phenomenon commonly experienced with plantains. When we fry unripe plantains, they’re really sour and we can’t enjoy them much (unless, of course, we season them). In contrast, when we fry overripe plantains, they can turn out quite soggy. We typically enjoy plantains best when we fry them just when they are just ripe enough. Adapting from this analogy, you can think of your waiting period as one which is moving you (by its passing) to your “right time/season”, instead of one that’s passing you by.
Data
After you’ve made peace with time’s passage, what can you do? You can collect data. What does the data collection process involve in this context? Introspection, recognition, and appreciation.
Reflect about your skills and gifts. What are you great at? What are you a natural at? Take note when next an opportunity catches your eye and ask yourself why you’re interested in it. This would help later when you’re trying to figure out what career opportunities to choose from a range of options or offers, because then, you can then judge them against your skills and areas of interest (which you have now become aware of).
By being better-informed of your own resources, you know what you bring to the table when next an opportunity comes. You’re more confident and self-aware, and you’re less likely to go for an opportunity just because others say it’s the next logical step, or because it’s the rave of the moment.
Disappointments
This is a tough one because no one of us likes disappointments. Yet, a major transformation can begin from a place of pain. Getting back after a disappointment can teach you endurance and patience. It may be initially hard to manage, but I encourage you to open your heart and try to look at things differently.
For example, if you didn’t get a job you thought you were in the frontline running for, or if you just got the results of a major qualifying exam and failed, take some time to process things. Ask yourself some sincere questions: Was there something I should have known? What can I do better? How can I improve myself so this doesn’t happen next time?
By teasing through the feedback you receive (from your introspection and from anyone who is in the position to give you constructive feedback- such as a senior colleague, a mentor, supervisor or boss), your way of thinking can become truly refined, opening you up to the prospects of doing much better at the next go.
Community
The saying “no man is an island” supports the viewpoint that no one was meant to go through life alone. This is true. While chasing your dreams, lean into the encouragement of like-minded friends and family. Entrust your goals to people you know can support you and hold you accountable when you are tempted to quit. To close with a very succinct quote I found from an inspiring book (Show Your Worth by Shelmina Babai Abji), “You cannot belittle yourself to greatness”. Embrace the value of your unique skills, celebrate your growth, stay focused, and your dreams will come true.
Author’s Note
I wrote this article to encourage women who wonder about chasing their dreams while staying true to the other areas of life they are keen to excel at. My goal was to communicate with compassion, because I understand how easy it is to get overwhelmed by information (particularly from sources which may not really help the issue). Waiting is hardly easy, and waiting on yet-to-be fulfilled career dreams can be daunting. It’s my hope that readers can find some comfort and renewed hope through these words. Thank you for reading :).
